Sunday, May 31, 2009

THE CHILD IN ME

I am behaving just like a child who has just learnt writing and he goes on scribbling on very available material where he can write or like a child who has been gifted a colour box. Same ways he goes on trying out new colours, new combinations and tries to paint everything around him.

And that is what I have been doing since last one week. When I became a blogger I just chose the easily available template. While visiting other people’s blog I always used to wonder how come they have such eye catching lay outs?

Then suddenly while surfing on Google I came across the word blogger templates and Gosh! I am become like an alcoholic who is so addicted to his booze and has got so tipsy that he can’t see anything else then his fill.

Changing my blog lay out has become not only an obsession but I suppose some psychologist may classify my behavior as obsessive compulsive neurosis. I feel compelled to go on various sites and choose various layouts. During past one week I have visited so many sites on blog templates that no wonder I may get a response from some site “lady no more visit to our site, you have crossed all the limits”.
I not only visit but I download various templates, try them out in my blog , leave it for few hours and then again I am on my hunt for new pastures. And seeing the new look makes me glee like a child. and it gives me a different high to see my blog decorated with new colours and designs.

My this behavior reminded me of famous Psychologists Eric Berne and Thomas A Harris and their famous books GAMES PEOPLE PLAY AND I AM OK YOU ARE OK) ,. In these books they talks about how there is a child hidden in every individual and how the child asserts itself and peeps out from our adult body. And, how our day to day behavior is divided into PARENT CHILD AND ADULT. Our each act is manifestation of either of these three.

So, my this fascination to try out new lay outs is actually my hidden child who is dying to come out from my grown up self to remind me of his existence and also to remind me that to enjoy life, to behave like a child is no crime and I will not be incriminated .

Hey, everyone who is reading this blog ----------let the child in you surface out although the child makes his presence felt in every one’s life daily like when we get angry, we throw temper tantrums,when we fight, when we demand things like children do, we clap our hands when we are happy and so on and so forth.

But I would say make a conscious effort to enjoy small things of life, celebrate like a child does ,giggle , jump with joy and become forgiving like children. Do not let the adult and parent in you dominate your life so as to make it dull and boring . Release the child in you from your adult body and let it emerge and help you sail through the traumas of adulthood

CHEERO and WELCOME to the child in you

Friday, May 29, 2009

MOTHERHOOD MY OWN FEELINGS

Just yesterday read one of the posts where the father has described the ecstasy of being a father. . True to become a parent is the best gift any one get and I will never trade this God’s gift of motherhood for anything in the world.

The gush of emotion that the mother feels when her child comes and sleeps in her lap or hugs her cannot be described in words. It has to be felt. My both the children fall in the category of adults but I still feel as if my bosom is brimming with milk when my son comes to me and hugs me (he does this only when he is tensed during the exams--LOL) and just thinking of my daughter takes me to an euphoric heaven .I still feel a tug in my heart when I hear her name or come across her handwriting (She is in USA pursuing her career from last 4 years)

It is not easy to be a mother and I speak from my own experience

Motherhood the eternal joy comes with its perks too, sleepless nights, exhaustion, sorrows, anxieties, at times the feeling of helplessness ( when you see your loved one in pain and you cannot do anything ) but nothing will make a mother more happy or feel proud when she sees her offspring developing into individual entities. Motherhood is an excitement, an enticement and a growth process for both, the mother and her saplings.

A mother is more often than not finds herself sandwiched between her husband and children. She finds herself a victim of tug of war between the two important parts of her life, her better half and her progeny. Each complains of her being partial to the other one. And there are times when the mother has to forget her identity, her own ego to strike a balance between the two and to maintain a peaceful enviornment in the family

The most paradoxical situation which a mother faces is when her children are ready to fly away from her nest. She, herself has prepared her fledglings to fly, she has encouraged them to try their wings ----but when the actual time comes she is the first to feel disconsolate, heartbroken and crushed

Suddenly she finds as if her whole world is on the verge of collapse, her own being in the world becomes wobbly But she who is the backbone of the family, who is the very foundation of her children’s life cannot tumble down and make their future shaky, so she gears up all her courage and puts up a smile, transforms herself into a robot and sets her precious ones free.

The most traumatic situation for a mother is watch her secured one standing alone amidst problems and facing the world alone and she like an impotent person can not do anything. But the only consolation she dervies from this helpless sitaution is that part of her life has become and becoming strong enough to deal with the turmoils of life on her own

True, mothers have to be made of steel to withstand the difficulties that are sure to beset their children. And if a mother is able to make her loved ones strong enough to weather any stormy conditions and if her cherished ones have the confidence that their mother is there as a buffer to provide them the required cushion of comfort in times of need then I think her motherhood is justified
( depending on my mood swings i will add more to this post . so be prepared for a series on feelings of a mother)

Monday, May 25, 2009

My three blogging resolutions

Only one month of active blogging and I find myself more refreshed, more alert, and totally rejuvenated. As I read yesterday “Just as working out daily in the gym increases one’s fitness, regular writing makes one a better writer.”.

Suddenly I find myself brimming with ideas. It is said empty mind is devil’s work shop but I would say empty mind is the right ground for blogging workshop.

For me blogging has become an addiction these days. The only thing I think these days is what I should write? This media has made my otherwise barren mind a fertile ground for ideas. .
Just an example if I happen to go anywhere, as soon as I leave my place the ideas start storming my mind and by the time I reach my destination I have already written a fully fledged blog ( in my mind) and in my return journey another blog is all set to take birth

The only problem is when I actually sit to pen down the product of my ruminating sessions, all the ideas get so jumbled up that nothing coherent comes from my cramped head.

While going through some blog I read “Respect your reader’s time. When someone is online reading your blog, there are a thousand other things they can do with their time”

Reading this made me go into introspection regarding the contents of my blog. I know my weakness. Normally Whenever I sit down to express myself ,the words flow like a free flowing stream and then there is no stopping it. But then I have to consider my blogging buddies( so what, even if very few read my blog , but I must respect them and their time . They must get value for time and my expressions should not get so lengthy so as to make all of them skip through the entire post or make them restless or so bored that they never return back to blog.

So today I took three resolutions as far as my writing is concerned

1. From now onwards I will make conscious efforts to keep my blog short. No going on and on ( some restrain has to be there)

2. From now onwards I will try to write meaningful and interesting posts daily

3. And, if I am not able to adhere to my above two resolutions then I will not bang my head to full fill them. Once in a while deviation from the routine will be allowed and I will let the word diarrhea flow freely (after all I am here to express myself and give concrete shape to my beliefs and this is the media which has given me my identity )

So here I am wishing myself all the best with my resolutions and happy blogging.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

what is there in a name?

I distinctly remember those précis writing exercises during my school days. I could answer all the questions but when it came to giving a heading or title to the paragraph I used to strike against a wall. Ideas for a title just didn’t flow.

I used to think that with the passage of time and as I grow more mature, more constructive, more knowledgeable I will overcome this hitch but then, nothing has changed even now as far as branding something with a suitable title is concerned.

That is the main reason I am often faced with a stumbling block every time I try to post something.

Although I have a somewhat fertile mind as far as the subject matter and flow of idea is concerned but then the big question what title to give? And then I just save the excreta of my mind in some folder and try to forget it till the time I get something apt for my impressions

Shakespeare said “"What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.”

So if I follow him then I should not bother about the name but just go on penning my thoughts ( actually it is not penning but typing) What matters is what something is, not what it is called. so it is what is written in the text portion which will matter and not how and what I decorate it with?

But then this is the world of brands, eye catching packageing will pull people from all corners.

If attractive name is not given then who will read what I have written. After all proper marketing is the essence of the day.

Giving apt names is not only limited to posts but in our day to day life also we tend to put everything in proper compartments with proper names in it, be it relations or material things.
If a relation between two human beings is not given a proper name then the relation is looked down upon by the whole world. As soon as it is given label it becomes acceptable to all sundry.

A commodity in the market will not be saleable if it is not tagged properly. This is an era of decorating your merchandise with suitable appellation.

Now the big question is how do I adorn my posts? Without garnishing who will get attracted to my blog?

So now what do I do? Stop posting on my blog or wait for some miracle to happen and some external powers to come to my rescue or just let my thoughts flow and brand them as MY THOUGHTS 1, 2, 3 -------------so on and so forth?
Come on all my blogging buddies, save me from the this dilemma . rescue me from the clutches of coronation of my posts.

Monday, May 18, 2009

My passion ----reading

2 days back I read “JEFFERY ARCHER in Mumbai to promote his new book PATHS OF GLORY “and I wondered why so late? When his book is out in the market for so many days. and i had finished his new book almost one month back and mind you not the hard bound copy but the Xerox version available outside railway stations .That shows how easy it has become to grab any book ( price no bar) from the pavements, at traffic signals or outside stations.

When all the best sellers are available at throw away prizes then who will spend huge amounts to buy the original copies?

One thought led to another and I went back into flash back and just started musing over my reading pattern up till now . No, I am not referring to my Text books. Thank God that era is over. I am referring to reading for pleasure

Right from my school days, I was deeply involved in reading but at that time it was only Hindi novels and unending list of them too. Right from the classics like Premchand, Sharatchandra, Shivani to romantic and social Hindi novels (I used to specially enjoy the ones which were turned into Hindi movies) even suspense and thrillers too .You name it and I think I read those novels There were even those books which I was not supposed to read ------but then forbidden fruits are more sweet. isn't?

Then gradually started my transition from Hindi to English

When all my teenage friends were busy day dreaming about TDH boys in their life after reading Mills and Boons, I was engrossed in my Arthur Haileys, Chase, Perry Mason , Agatha Christies and above all Harold Robbins. Couldn’t help it as my dad had only these novels and he had never heard of Mills and Boons. Actually my first English novel was Airport by Arthur Hailey and second Carpetbeggers by Harold Robins. What a combination!!

And when my friends promoted to little heavy reading , I migrated to M & Bs, Barbara Cartland, Dennis Robbins etc. and funny person that I am , I never dreamt of TDH person in my life but I used to dream of those lovely gowns and breathtaking jewellery described in such details in Barbara Cartland novels . Actually that was the only part I used to look forward in those novels (may be this amounts to my passion even now for all sort of jewellery).Many a times I used to skip pages just to read the description of what the heroine wore in different balls, or outings.

Come to think of it I have had variety in my reading style.

I have read almost all of Jeffery Archer, Irving Wallace, Sidney Sheldon, Dan Brown ( he has only three), Chetan Bhagat ( frankly I dint like any one of his but just to show off and to be in times with latest trends I read all of them), Danielle Steel ( one of my favorite authors), Eric Segel ,some of Robin Cook, Jacqueline Susan ( I love Dolores ) quite a few of Jackie Collins, and many more. I don’t even remember the hundreds of books taken from local libraries or even at scrap shops( where they sell old papers and magazines) I never realized that I have read so many authors

It is not that I enjoy only fiction but depending on my mood I do relish management books, thought provoking essays and quotations ( I have tons of books on them), books on psychology, books on Reiki ( my latest passion, Feng Shui ( my passion few months back) Vastu, acupressure, Books related to diet, Health problems and if I am on one of introspective moods then I go for religious or spiritual books .

My greatest possession is my collection of books on all the subjects. They are my treasure. And out of this treasure the ones which are closed to my heart are some books presented to me by my father, my favorite book THE PRODIGAL DAUGHTER gifted by my daughter ,some health books bought by my husband during one of his rare moods.

I don’t know whether this madness to read is good or not but I do need to read something before sleeping.
No one will believe but once when i had nothing to read I was forced to read from the newspaper bag which I had got when I had gone out to buy fruits and I didn’t have anything to read

And the credit for my this obsession to read goes to my dad

And I think I even passed on some of this passion on my daughter too. But unfortunately my son and my husband are not so fond of reading, so when my son bought his first novel One night @ call center by Chetan Bhagat , I couldn’t believe my eyes and I had a bet with him that if he finished that novel I will give him 200 Rs.

And and ------he did finish that and not only that he even bought two more novels and finished them (may be for those 200 Rs which I had promised him for each novel he finished)

And the only novel which my husband can boost of finishing is Rage of Angles that too because it was a story of an advocate.

I strongly believe that books are your best friend and the best company. I would trade an interesting book with a gossip session with anyone any time. I read as I want to live.

Sunday, May 17, 2009

The great Indian Circus

The verdict has been given by the public. Results are out.
Congress has changed the history and what a victory? No one in their dreams had thought of such a result. All the exit polls, astrological predictions, numerological calculations were proved wrong by none other than the common man.

The period after voting was very busy for all the political parties and their leaders. All the news channels were busy with permutations and combinations of various parties. Speculations were being made. Lots of money was placed on many alliances

But hi! yeh na thi hamari kismet ;-(

We didn’t get the chance to savor and relish the assimilation and making of political salad of various parties

Actually we all have been cheated (by the results) of enjoying the great Indian Political circus. It was not in our fate to witness the juggling of members, the trapeze of political parties, and the long wait in anticipation, the hustle and bustle of various members, late night clandestine meetings, .

The media has been left in a lurch by this political battle. Their long and meticulous planning of covering every possible politician, their long agenda of interviews for all the prospective candidates who would have joined the winning party, their fully equipped vans, cameras, writing pads, tape recorders all have been left to rust by this over whelming majority which the Congress has gained and which has placed congress in a NO BARGAINING ZONE.

Now the congress need not go and beg other parties to pledge their support to them rather the tables have turned. The small parties are eagerly sending feelers to the all happy leaders of Congress and showing their willingness to join the winning giants.

All the leaders with their parties must have planned in advance how they will show their attitude (nakhras) and how much bargaining will be allowed? For how long should they stretch the rope of their consent? They must have also read everything available on barter system. but all in vain ;-(

Now with this victory all the winners are enjoying their dinners and parties without the worry of tomorrow. There is no need for them to lose their sleep over such mundane issues as to who should join them. They definitely have a upper hand. They can easily maneuver any situation to their gain.

Any ways we can say that it was destined. So now we must just wait and watch whether Lalu will come back or what ministry will Rahul get etc etc.

Now ,that the political arena is not going to provide us with much of fun. So here is little something to tickle our funny bones and exercise our facial muscles (the idea and some songs have been stolen from AAJ TAK channel) but thoda credit mereko bhi milna chahiye.

Just imagine what some of our leaders will be singing now?

1. Sonia “AAJ MEIN UPPER AASMAN NEECHE, AAJ MEIN AAGEN JAMANA HAI PICHE-------

2. Manmohan singh “ JO TUMKO HO PASAND VO HI BAAT KARENGE , TUM AGAR DIN KO RAAT KAHO RAAT KAHENGE

3. Mayawati , “ DIL KE ARMAAN AANSUON MEIN DHAL KAR REH GAYE, HUM WAFA KARKE BHI TANHA RAH GAYE

4. LaluPrasad, “ YAHAN KAUN HAI TERA MUSAFIR JAAYEGA KAHAN?

5. Adwani , “ KOI HUMDUM NA RAHA KOI SAHARA NA RAHA, HUM KISI KE NA HUE KOI HAMARA NA HUA?

6. Rahul, “ BACHNA A HASINO LO MEIN AA GAYA”

7. Varun, “ AA DEKHE JARA KISME KITNA HAI DUM

Anybody reading this post may put in your feed back in this series. Suggestions are welcome to make this list long.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

JAI HO

Jai ho
Once again India will be administered by remote control ( we saw the example in the first press release and conference of victorious Congress) everyone was more interested to hear Sonia Gandhi and it was worth watching the way Sonia Gandhi was manipulating the conference and of course Dr.M M Singh ---- Go here, now go there etc etc. It was prominently visible the way she was guiding the incoming PM
No doubt Congress is bursting with joy.
I wonder whether M M Singh will be doing Bhangra or Madam Gandhi will be jumping with joy (literally)
Can anyone imagine how they must be celebrating?
What a thumping victory for Congress. No one in their dreams thought that Congress will swipe away so many seats.
One big question only 42% of Indian population voted, and most of them were slum dwellers
What would have been the scene if the rest of the people had exercised their voting right?
What would have been the situation then?

Our media is funny. It is rightly said, “ Har koi chadte suraj ko pranam karta hai, dhalte ko nahi.” The same media was singing praises for Adwani and BJP till yesterday and now their tone have changed completely, “They deserved it”. “It was coming’, Innumerable reasons are being analyzed for their defeat.
Could it be their stand on Hinduvata or Varun’s radical statements? It’s any one’s guess?
One thing is sure Sonia , Priyanka and Rahul Gandhi are the reason for this development in Indian politics.
But these elections have taught one thing any new comer can come in limelight by doing something drastic or making a radical statement. Need I name the person? The credit for this goes to Varun Gandhi. One controversial statement, then jail then another revolutionary comment and you are on the top.
The results have shown that Gandhi family is here to stay.

Now the whole country is closely watching and anxiously waiting for the next leap of the blue eyed boy of congress. Whether he will take any post in the cabinet or not? And when will he be sworn as the next PM

And of course the million dollar question Whether Priyanka will join Politics or not?
Whether Manmohan Singh or Rahul or someone else According to me what the common man wants is dynamic leadership which can lead the whole nation to greater heights ,provide corruption less administration and repose the confidence of the public in our political system.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

HUM SAATH SAATH HAI?

I am very disturbed today. Not because of any tensions because of my children or husband but something which I came across

While I was sitting in my husband’s office, two very pretty young girls came to meet him in his office.I was just wondering what problems they may be having and then one of them said that she wanted divorce from her husband. And they were married not for more than few months and they had a love marriage. The other one was already a client of my husband who was visiting him regularly to expedite her divorce proceedings. And even she had a love marriage.

This perturbed me a lot. I just wondered what had gone wrong in their marriage. They had selected their life partners themselves (they cannot blame arranged marriage or lack of communication with their partners for that). They knew their partners very well. They must have discussed all the possible issues related to married life before hand also (I suppose so, as I don’t know what actually is discussed when two people go on dates, after all I had an arranged marriage and hardly any communication with him before marriage!)

No, I am not against Love marriage. Please don’t take me wrong. I am very much in favour of it as the couple gets many opportunities to know each other’s background, family, to know each other’s views, thoughts, feelings, to analyse each other’s attitudes etc.

Then what went wrong? Why have they decided to drift apart and that too within a year of marriage (They must have moved mountains to convince their parents regarding this match)?
Who was at fault? What was the bone of contention between the newlywed couple? Were they not able to sort out their differences on their own, or didn’t they have family members to advice and guide them to face the initial challenges of marriage.

This is true when two persons with two different personalities, different culture, background, different values decide to live together, there is bound to be clashes in their thoughts, egos. And I am sure all the couples enter into this arena of matrimonial life fully knowing this.

Specially, today when both the parties are educated, more knowledgeable and up with moving times, they can never complain that they were not aware that there will be differences and they will have to adjust their life style according to each other.

Then, why? Only after few months of married life these people decided to separate.
Was their endurance at its low? Or they had tried but things had gone out of their hands, Or they were not ready to adjust to each other’s needs and desires? Or their own personal ego was much more important than the feeling of WE? Or they belonged to that set of people who equate marriage to one night stands only and who have the attitude “let us give a try, if we are compatible we will stay together otherwise we will leave each other”?

It is not that in the past, couples did not face these teething problems of marital life but then I suppose they showed more composure, more understanding towards each other and they were ready to adjust (granted more from the wife’s side as compared to husband’s) but they did manage to stay together and faced the initial hurdles of this so called lifelong commitment.

Another thing that disturbed me was to see the girl with her friend and not with some family members. Divorce is a big step. Was that girl taking that step on her own without consultation or support from her family? Because if the family knows about it then I don’t think that they will allow the girl to visit the advocate on her own and discuss such an important issue on her own.

I will advocate such cases where it becomes humanly impossible for both the partners to live together, to part ways and take their individual stand and lead their life as they want. I will also favour such couples where the partners are not able to satisfy the physical, financial as well as emotional needs of the other partner.

But at least give it a try. Don’t take impulsive step of separating. I have seen cases and of course read a lot that divorce leaves many scars within both the parties, it handicaps them in many ways and affects their future relations too.

I may be sounding old fashioned or many may put aside my post as something written by someone who doesn’t understand today’s generation BUT it is a fact that I am very disturbed by this new trend of divorce that too so early in the married life.

Someone said,” STAYING SINGLE IS CHIC, DIVORCE IS IN VOGUE, LIVE IN RELATIONS ARE FASHION, AND EXTRA MARITAL RELATIONS ARE COMMON AND HERE I AM --- HAPPILY MARRIED! BLOODY TOTALLY OUTDATED! AM I REALLY OUTDATED?

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Father dear father

With the rising sun came the voice on FM radio.”Today 6th of May ------ and hearing this suddenly I got out of my trance and said that means tomorrow is 7th May. How could I forget it?
7th May (my dad’s birth anniversary) has got nostalgic emotions for me. This was the day many years back when I first held a real rose flower bouquet in my hand. For me 7th May and fruit cream, tandoori roti and of course the most delectable alu ki sabzi (made by my dad with lots of ghee and tons of love), I have ever had are synonyms of each other. I can never think of 7th May without all these. And how much hard I try I can never make half as tasty alu ki sabzi as the ones I have had countless number of times and after marriage most of my summer vacations ( till my daughter entered her X) were planned so that I could be there in Delhi with my dad on this day.

While I was having a memorable journey in the bygone days and remembering one of the best fathers a girl can have, flashed an apt advertisement (to the emotions I was experiencing )on one of the channels of TV

It showed a Bride and groom walking down the aisle and suddenly the girl stumbles upon something and she is about to fall but the groom saves her from falling and holds her in his arms. And next shot is of the father who is watching the whole thing. And suddenly he goes back in flash back and remembers how he used to save his daughter from falling in similar situations. Then again the camera is flashed on father’s face. The longing, concern, love and affection is very beautifully shown on his face. For a second he steps forward then stops himself and lets the groom help his daughter. And then he pats the boy and smiles. And then follow the publicity of the product which I just ignored.

Watching this like any mother who sees or reads anything remotely concerned with daughter’s marriage, tears veiled in my eyes. And I started relating and dreaming of my loved one’s marriage. But simultaneously I was engulfed with many thoughts of my relation with my father and father and daughter’s relation in general

As the women are more expressive and demonstrative, much has been written and known about their feelings, emotions and expressions with relation to her children but very little attention is paid to the inner turmoil of father (he is supposed to be the strong one in the family after all)

I wondered how a father feels when his beautiful princess gets married. Right from the moment the daughter is born, most of the fathers develop parental neurosis i.e. they become afraid that his precious girl may go ashtray. They feel that it their duty to impose rules about dating and whom she will date, what company will she keep etc etc.

A Father is always afraid that some boy will take advantage of his cherished one. He wants to monitor each and every moment of his treasure.

Then how he must be feeling when he himself gives away his daughter to some stranger happily? (Although it is a known fact in a father’s eye no boy is worth his revered one and no one can be compared to his dear daughter).

Like the father in the advertisement every father must be feeling reluctant to let go his daughter and must be undergoing many apprehensions whether the boy for his dear one will take care of her or not, whether he is the right choice or not. And then with heavy heart he allows some unknown person to drive away his apple of eye in another world away from him . How he must be feeling to realise that now onwards his place in his loved one's life will become secondary and some one else will be there to take care of each and every need of hers and protect her from all the misgivings?

Even my father must have felt the same when I got married ( after all I was his laadli beti) and I am sure my husband will be feeling the same ( someone out there please take a note of this).Like my husband who thinks that his daughter is the best ,even my father must have felt the same.

I distinctly remember him asking me after I received my first letter from my husband, “did he write good letter? Actually he meant was it a letter dripping with love.

If he had his way he would have loved to read all my letters (although I let him read one or two to quench his curiosity)

I am very lucky to have had nurturance from my dad. He was the one who encouraged me to be adventurous; he introduced me to the word of reading, music that too gazals, playing cards and so many other things. His presence always gave me the confidence to go anywhere in the world and meet complete strangers with ease.

Many a times while dealing with my children I have tried to analyse my father’s reaction in similar situation and then I have corrected myself.

Two things which I can never forget about my father is (1)his confidence in all his children and telling my brother and sisters and ofcourse me ,“come and tell me yourself if you have done anything which you should not have done. So that when some outsider tells me about your act I should be able to say it with confidence that I know about it” (2) his optimistic and positive attitude in any crisis.
I always try to copy him, his attitude, his style in my life and especially with my childern. I hope my way of dealing with situations in life meets with his approval and he feels proud of me wherever he is.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

ऐसा क्यूँ होता है?


ऐसा क्यूँ होता है कि जिन बच्चो को हम हाथ पकड़ कर चलना सिखाते है वो जब चलना सीख जाते है और हमारा हाथ छोड़ कर अकेले भागना चाहते है तो हमें दुःख होता है। उनको ऊँचे आसमान में उड़ने कि प्रेरणा हम देते है , उनके पंखो में जान डालते है और जब वो उड़ना सीख जाते है और गगन के दुसरे छोर को छुना चाहते है तो हमे जहाँ एक तरफ़ खुशी मिलती है वहीं दूसरी ओर अकेलेपन का एहसास क्यूँ मार डालता है। यह तो जिंदगी कि सचाई है कि पर मिलने के बाद पंछी भी माँ का घोसला छोड़ कर दूसरा आशियाँ बनाने को निकल जाते है। आखिकार हम येही तो चाहते है कि हमारे बच्चे नाम कमाए, जिंदगी में कुछ बन जाए, स्वालंबी बन जाए। अपनी जगह ख़ुद बनाये फिर क्यूँ माँ बाप दुखी हो जाते है जब बच्चे अपनी जिंदगी ख़ुद अपनी मर्जी से जीना चाहते है।
बचपन में हर बच्चे को माँ बाप कि जरुरत होती है.पर समय के साथ साथ यह जररु़त जगह बदल लेती है। बाद में ऐसी सिथ्ती आ जाती है जब बच्चो को नही बल्कि माँ बाप को बच्चो कि जरुँरत होने लगती है।
में कई बार यह सोच में पड़ जाती हु कि बच्चो से कुछ उम्मीद करना ग़लत है कि सही है। हमने बच्चो कि इस उम्मीद से तो पैदा नही कीया था कि वो बड़े होकर हमारा सहारा बनेंगे?
I salute those parents who are living and enjoying their life with each other and have let their children live their own life .
मेरे ख्याल से यह उनकी जिंदगी के वो सुनहरे पल है जो उनको एक दुसरे के साथ जीने चाहिए क्यूंकि शायद अभी उनको मौका मिला है एक दुसरे को समझाने का , एक दुसरे को जानने का । नही तो काफ़ी जिंदगी तो उन्होंने ने अपने बच्चो के पीछे ही निकाल दी ।( this is my way of positive thinking -----The only silver lining in this period of their old age which they should be enjoying with their children and grand children and now they are forced to live a lonely life is to think that they have got a chance to know each other and give quality time to each other and rejuvenate their relation with each other.)
so parents whose children are away from them enjoy each and every moment of this period. give your full attention to your partner. take care of all the needs of your other half BUT be there for your children whenever they need you.
After all the children are there because of us. We are responsbile for what they have become in life.
and I hope the children also appreciate this reality that their being is because of their parents.

yes I did it

I am feeling very proud that I did vote. I was finally able to overcome my confusion regarding whether to vote or not. Although, it was not an easy decision especially with my other half being totally against it. But Yes I did it. I even managed to drag my somewhat stubborn other half to the polling booth and exercise one of our fundamental right.
Like millions of Indians even I am not very much convinced with our political system. We all know that who so ever comes in power is not going to bring about drastic change in our surroundings or put India on the top ladder of world map .But then just to sit and do nothing and blame others is not the solution.
But there has to be a beginning. So I contributed my micro bit in the process of making a better India with the hope and expectation that something good will come out of it.
I don’t know who was more responsible for changing my mind regarding casting my vote. Whether it was my father in law who after every half an hour was pushing me to go and vote or the excitement of my son who went to vote for the very first time and was proudly flaunting his middle finger with a long ink mark on it or was it to see group of people or the general attitude of people on the road who were anxiously waiting in long queues despite the scorching sun or I deep in my heart also wanted to proudly admit to others that Yes I did vote and condemn the ones who didn’t.
It was a tough decision to select from the long list of 19 contestants (can’t believe there were 19, as we only knew 2 heavy weight champions in the political arena. From where did these 17 with such hilarious symbols to their credit popped up?) This made me wonder were they not aware that they stand no chance of getting even 1% of the total vote casted. So why did they fill up the nomination form and deposited the security. Was it the thrill of seeing their names on the contestants list, or to become a permanent part of history or there was some ulterior motive of some of some involved parties?
I don’t want to dwell upon the intricacies of my selection of the candidate as it was very tough to choose between the party and the candidate. The party whose ideologies doesn’t appeal to me was being represented by one of the well known persons of our country who is intelligent and rather new in this battle of politics and is with pragmatic ideas. And I am not sure whether the party whom I voted for will really do something for us?
But yes, I am feeling very proud that I am one of those 41% odd voters who exercised their option and not one of the rest of the 59% who chose not to vote and now will just criticize each and every act of the Government and Look down upon politics.
One thing which I couldn’t understand was about one lakh polling agents didn’t vote although they were on the duty at different polling booths. These agents were given the option of postal ballots long before then why didn’t they use it. And all these one lakh agents comprises the educated strata of our society. If they were amongst the uneducated lot one could understand that they were not able to understand and follow the instructions given to them regarding postal ballot. But why these people did not select their party and candidate is beyond my imagination
Now when the excitement of election fever is dwindling and result fever is mounting up. I just pray that who so ever comes in power will for a change think about the country and its people first rather than think about himself and his family.